Saturday, August 16, 2003

helluva day. been at work since 7:30 am. *** So um. yeah. Joy. in my life. it's fleeting. I'm tired. I had like 4 hrs of sleep. feel kinda gross too. I REALLY need to eat healthier than i have the last few days. Appt at western psych on monday. maybe they can make me less mental and make me have self esteem and not despise myself when i think of where i work and what i do. i just wanna be happy. tired of being an emotional mess and hating myself and being so unhappy with me and my life and feeling like a loser. For ONCE in my life i'd like to not feel like a piece of shit. That'll be different and original. Anyways, Guess it's time to actually leave.

these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
--evanescence

God, people who post song lyrics are dorky and i kinda hate when they do it. But thats kinda just the thing playing over and over in my head. yeah. leaving. before i type something else even more self-revealing.

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