Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Two pics shy of a photo blog

I know I've been posting pictures instead of actually writing content. I just haven't been having an easy time putting the nose to the grindstone (that isn't shit on my nose, you see, it's wheat flour) and being productive. Poor Bob's still stuck at the DMV because I'm too lazy to actually sit down and write. I've been puttering away at some other stuff. Which makes people on my mailing list happy, but reduces my odds of actually producing something sellable by 7/9ths.


1) The ivy plant in my cubicle is growing kickassly (I love inventing words) well since I put all my husband's old stones in the pot. There was something about looking at the dirt that was depressing. And I like the stones. They're pretty and colorful and they make me happy (I like shiny things). They're his weird little ritual hoozie whatsie stones from his Wiccan days. Maybe I should take 'em out of the pot. Maybe my ivy plant is going to turn into a mystical evil ivy plant that will strangle me whilst I work. No wait, my life's really boring; that'd be fun.

2) I'm reading Blink by Malcom Gladwell. I just picked it up at the libarry. So far it's pretty interesting. It's about just how much information we actually take and process and use from our first impressions.

3) I'm chewing the second worst gum I've ever tasted. The first worst is any gum that tastes like peppermint. I fricking hate Christmas (see previous rants about mom going psycho for every major holiday) and I don't need candy that's going to TASTE like mom waking us up in the middle of the night, ala Mommy Dearest screaming and making us clean because she can't handle the holidays. The only thing missing is someone screaming "NO WIRE HANGERS!" whenever you rip open the package. You know what you can shove those candy canes. No. Really.

Anyways, this is the second worst because it tastes like toothpaste. It's spearmint, which is somehow less damaging to my delectate psyche, but it has that weird paste sort of tang to it, and I wanna spit, rince my mouth out and gargle Scope instead of swallowing my minty spit.

4) Whoopsie, I left my purse (fricking HATE that word, man) in my cubicle all night. Not sure how I left it here. But my camera was in it, not to mention all that stupid girly stuff I haveta haul around incase someone important happens by and I am forced to look like a grownup (HATE that, man).

5) I got a new wallet today. My old wallet was in sorry/desperate shape and I kept saying "I need to stop bitching and doing something about it," and my husband would say YES DEAR, but I wouldn't actually do anything about it. It's pink, and I'm scared.

6) I also bought a pair of earrings today. Dark, almost black sapphire stones. Are they supposed to be black cherries? I don't know. But I'm feeling bad about life, the universe and everything, especially after having two laundry incidents in two days, and on top of that, all my colored clothes are splotching and bleaching in places and my white clothes are getting brown/orange "rust" stains ALL over them (bought stuff to handle that... hope it actually works. Not sure how to solve the problem perminantly). Yeah, I'm trying to pacify myself with toys. I'm a shallow human being, what do you want?

7) This gum really fricking sucks, and I just ate more. I hope there's a 12 step program for people like me

8) I bought a wicker hamper today. In a further attempt to solve the laundry problem. I will lose what little remains of my mind if two things don't happen: a) there stops being clothes thrown at the bottom of the cellar steps and b) we haveta stop not putting the clothes away (*pats self on back for use of double-negative* Diagram it. You'll see). It brings back horrific and traumatic childhood experiences involving my mother and her going nuts at times not related to holidays.

9) I wanna go on vacation some place warmer. However, Southwest is running like $39 one way tickets to Chicago. And I miss Chicago. And I'd like to visit and show my husband around. He does not like this idea. Oh yeah, and I'm fricking poor.

10) There is no number ten.


Blogger laurenbove said...

Stuff back atcha:

1. I also hate the word purse, I hate the shape my mouth makes when saying it and I hate the conjured image of my great grandmother holding this ungodly green vinyl bag with a lethal snap closure in the middle that could lop off a finger.

2. I also love to make up words. If you know me or my online writings, you'll see this is true.

and lastly

3. If you have the money just barely go to Chicago and have a wonderful time. Just do it.

6:59 PM  

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