Friday, February 10, 2006

SO unfortunate.




Where do I even start? First of all, the hair is weird. It looks weird and plastic and fake, like the hair on a fake barbie doll.

Second of all, too much plastic surgery. Madonna's eyes are now weird and frog-like and she is possibly wearing more eye makeup than Hillary Duffy. Which is difficult. Her skin and hair and the rest of her makeup are all the same damned color, and she washes out.

But is a complete contrast to herblackand white outfit, which makes her look like one of those deranged maniquins at JC Penny that's kind of a characture of a person, all one color with weird beviled hair.

The Xena top outfit isn't workingfor her. She doesn't have Xena's boobies now that she's an anorexic over-excercized cow. Those bracelets only further stand to accentuate the unfortunate mess that is her lower arms, Xena's skirt was cooler, it was leather and it layed nicer.

And what the hell's going on with the boots? Are they really high boots? Or are her tights the same material asthe boots, and so it looks like one piece? If you only look from the bottom of the skirt down, she looks like the wicked witch of something or other. It's freaky. Madonna, eat food, please. Also, you're too freaking old to run around wearing clothes that looked good yet slutty on you twenty years ago. It's ok to get old, hon. It's ok to wear clothes that flatter your now-aging (and preferably wiser) body. It's not OK to wear clothes that only make your saggy old lady boobies look even more saggy and old lady-ish than they might already be. It's not OK to wear clothes that're going to show off your sad old-lady upper arms. Eat a hamburger andn buy something with sleeves.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can always tell a writer. They write 5 paragraphs to say what most people would say in 5 or 6 words:

"Madona looks like a bar-fly."

3:39 PM  
Blogger HMC said...

It's the eyes and the hair that bother me. Seriously scary.

7:30 AM  
Blogger Jenn said...

what you say is so right its like reading the bible

11:10 PM  

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